So I’ve been just a little depressed lately, okay a lot. Hmmm what was on my mind? I donno really. I guess the whole 'moving to a new school and having it not be what I thought it would be' thing sort of has me in a slump. Im just not so happy without my joyful friends to keep me smiling. I haven’t been able to doodle up the awesomeness since school started. Highschool is a cruel mistress thats for sure. People in my new school don’t even compare to my middle school friends. I went to a musical over at the highschool and started weeping because everybody I knew grew up. Everyone said they missed me and that didn’t make it any better. I feel so stressed out. Maybe its my teenageness. I feel like I don’t really deserve friends. I was told that guys would like me but I really haven’t seen anybody thats interested. I’ve had Matt on my mind lately :/ I donno why he bothers me so much. It seems that he’s apart of my unhappiness. He’s a cloud of shameful dust hovering about my future vision. I had something to " hold onto" and now its gone. I feel like a babydoll that cant really stand on its two feet without a guiding hand. I want to get better but I don’t think I will anytime soon.